When you’re preparing to go into divorce mediation, there are certain steps you can take to help the process go smoother. Below, read about what to do and what not to do in mediation so you are ready for an effective and satisfactory mediation process.
Do Get Organized
As we mention in our How To Protect Your Assets During a Divorce</em> blog, it is important to keep the proper documentation of who owns your various assets, and whether each asset is separate property or marital property. Additionally, it will help you to have a full understanding of your financials before going into a mediation. Our Data Gathering Packet will also help you get organized and you can find more information about how the Data Gathering Packet helps your get organized in this blog.
Do Keep an Open Mind
There is not a one size fits all method to go through a divorce. Every couple will need to consider their unique circumstances and find a solution that works for them. Even before you decide on how to go through your divorce, you will need to determine if mediation, collaborative divorce, or litigation is the right path forward. In a mediation, it will be helpful for both parties to come prepared to think creatively about how to reach an outcome that will satisfy both of you.
Do Take Breaks
Even if your divorce is relatively amicable, you may find yourself getting too overwhelmed or frustrated during the mediation to move forward constructively. If this happens, be sure to take breaks to take a breath and collect your thoughts.
Do Have a Plan
Even though it will be helpful to keep an open mind in the mediation process, the process will go more smoothly if you have already considered non-negotiables and places where you’re willing to compromise or think creatively. If both you and your spouse come in with a plan, you will likely reach satisfactory outcomes more easily.
Don’t Be Unwilling to Compromise
As we mentioned in “How To Break a Stalemate in Negotiations,” small compromises can be extremely effective. Rather than digging your heals in to every suggestion, look for the moments when you can make small compromises that you’ll both be happy with in the long run.
Don’t Refuse Alternative Options or Shy Away From Creative Solutions
If all things go well, your spouse will also come in ready to think openly and creatively about how you can both leave the negotiation feeling satisfied with the outcomes. With this in mind, it will be important to listen openly to the solutions or compromises they bring to the discussion. If they suggest an option you have not considered before, don’t turn it down immediately. Instead, take time to think through this new option and determine if it would really work for you.
Don’t be Afraid to Voice What You Want
Finally, it is imperative that you carefully consider and voice what you want in the mediation. If you do not take the chance to speak directly about the outcomes that will (or won’t) work for you, you may not be able to come to a solution that you are comfortable with as you transition into the next phase of your life.
If you want help with strategy for dividing your financials and assets, reach out to a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® who can help you make a plan. At Alternative Divorce Solutions, we look forward to supporting you as you enter into negotiations. Do not hesitate to reach out to us to schedule your free initial consultation.
